It is the time of year for new beginnings. Each time the calendar turns to January 1st, we have the opportunity to start with a clean slate, regardless of how the previous year went. The excitement of starting over and the promise of being a “better” you can get to anyone, particularly when we live in such a commercially-driven and materialistic culture. I am not going to lie and say that I’ve never made a New Year’s Resolution. I have made many resolutions and I’m not sure I can even remember them all, but I am pretty sure I’ve failed to accomplish most of them. Not because I’m lazy or lack ambition; my goals were simply misguided.
Think of some common resolutions: lose weight, get a “beach body,” cut out sugar, earn more money. These are goals brought about by messages we receive from society: people who are thinner are happier, people with more money are happier, sugar will make you fat, etc.
Personally, if I think back to goals I’ve accomplished, they have not been goals I set because of what someone else told me to do. I decided to qualify for the Boston Marathon because I wanted a memorable experience that would also be a challenging one. I wanted to push my limits as a runner. I went to graduate school because I wanted to study counseling, not because I believed having a Master’s Degree would make me happier than having a Bachelor’s Degree.
It is important to regularly reflect on our values and to align our daily habits with those values. Is being thin something I truly value? No, but my health is something I value and emotional and spiritual health are as important as physical health. To me, this means I am going to have a cookie or a malt from time to time.
In addition to not being aligned with our values, I think another danger with New Year’s Resolutions is the time constraints. Big goals call for big changes, which can be intimidating. For this reason, I try to break my larger goals into smaller, micro goals. Accomplishing a small goal builds confidence and helps you continue moving toward the larger goals. Allowing yourself some grace in the process helps too. If you skip a workout or slip and have that second cookie, your goals are not suddenly out of reach.
In the end, I think that we often miss the bigger picture when we are overly focused on our goals. I have succumbed to this on numerous occasions. The truth is, I am fine just as I am. I have enough, I do enough, and I am enough. And so are you.
If your really want to set a New Year’s Resolution, read this post from last year for a different perspective on goals.
Redefined Runner 