Trust Your Path

For those who know me well, you may scoff if I say that my career path has been a little windy. I have known since I was young that I love to be around people and to help others, but there are many careers that fit this description. My first true inkling of what I wanted to do (not sure I would count my desire to be a marine biologist after watching Free Willy) was in high school when I took an Introduction to Psychology class. I was fascinated by it. I loved learning about the human mind and how it develops over time, as well as how we interact with others based on what occurs in the brain. Throughout my schooling, I especially liked learning about personality types and how they can blend well or clash with one another. In case you’re curious, my Meyers-Briggs type is an ESFJ. Seriously, I think my feelings have feelings.

Anyway, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do involving psychology, but I knew I wanted to learn more about it. I majored in the subject in college and continued to explore ideas of what I could do with it. My first thought was to be a high school social studies teacher because then I could teach others about something I loved while also coaching cross-country or track. As it turns out, I didn’t have much of an interest in government or history and my college did not have a sociology department, so teaching was not for me. I did not want to be a teacher who had no passion. Underneath my goal of teaching was a lack of self-confidence. I thought about counseling or school psychology, but lacked confidence in my ability to earn admission into graduate school. I pushed my desires down and focused on getting a job after graduation that would help get my husband through law school.

Next came my brief interlude with personal training. I have always enjoyed exercise and sports. I love being active and also found my anatomy and physiology class to be interesting (really one of the few science classes I’ve liked), so why not try personal training, right? WRONG. I had done some research into the field, but did not realize how sales-oriented it is and I am not the sales type. I do not feel the need to pressure people into something they don’t want and I don’t believe people will not be successful without my help. That’s just plain arrogant. I had little time to mope about losing my job at the gym, however, so I went to a social service temp agency to look for work. That is how I ended up doing case management for adults with disabilities for several years.

It is some of the most difficult and rewarding work I’ve ever done, but still not quite the right fit. As one of my former coworkers once said, “You need to find your heart song.” I just always felt like I wanted something more. I finally got the courage to give graduate school a try after Peter finished law school and got his first job. It has been a long and difficult road, but I know I made the right choice. I took my first counseling class in the fall of 2008. I gave birth to my daughter that November, continued classes for the next few years, gave birth to my son in March of 2012, then finally completed my capstone project in December of 2012. I did not get a counseling degree, as we could not afford for me to do a practicum and internship. My GPA was better than it ever was because I loved what I was doing. After a short break from grad school, I returned to take a few more classes and earned a school counseling certificate in May of 2015.

Here I am, three years later. I don’t have a permanent position yet, but have done several substitute positions. Each time I step into the school or a classroom, I am renewed. I get so much joy from seeing the students smile or laugh, especially if it took work to get them to that point. I was made for this. I have had doubts and frustrations along the way, but each job I’ve had has improved my skills and my compassion, and introduced me to so many unique, inspiring, and talented people. Trust your path. Maybe you expected a ladder and you got a mountain. Oh, well. You can reach the summit by traversing many routes, some more rocky or difficult than others, but the timing won’t matter when you see the views.